LESSON NOTES · レッスンノート

N5Grammar, one piece at a time · Sep 14, 2026

ほしい vs たい: wanting a thing, wanting to do, and wanting someone else to

ほしい means you want a *thing*; 〜たい means you want to *do* something. Both are い-adjectives, both take が, and — the part nobody warns you about — neither can be used about another person. 彼かれは行いきたいです is wrong; it has to be 行いきたがっています.

Between them these two cover most of what a beginner needs to say, and the third piece, 〜てほしい ("I want you to…"), turns them into a way of asking for things.

The basics

The split

Want what Pattern Example
A thing noun + が + ほしい 水みずがほしいです
To do something verb ます-stem + たい 水みずが飲のみたいです
Someone else to do something te-form + ほしい 手伝てつだってほしいです

新あたらしい靴くつがほしいです。 — I want new shoes. (polite — a thing) 日本にほんに行いきたいです。 — I want to go to Japan. (polite — an action)

たい attaches to the ます-stem, exactly like 〜やすい and 〜にくい: 飲のみます → 飲のみたい, 食たべます → 食たべたい, します → したい.

Both are い-adjectives

Once attached, ほしい and たい conjugate like 高たかい:

ほしい 行いきたい
Present ほしい 行いきたい
Negative ほしくない 行いきたくない
Past ほしかった 行いきたかった
Past negative ほしくなかった 行いきたくなかった

昨日きのうは何なにも食たべたくなかったです。 — I didn't want to eat anything yesterday. (polite past negative)

So ほしいでした and 行いきたいでした do not exist, for the same reason 高たかいでした does not — see い-adjectives vs な-adjectives.

The particle: が, and sometimes を

With ほしい it is always が. With たい, both が and を appear:

水みずが飲のみたいです。 — I want to drink water. (polite — が, the classic form) この本ほんを読よみたいです。 — I want to read this book. (polite — を, also natural)

The rough tendency: が emphasises the thing you want, を keeps the focus on the action. Both are correct, and long sentences with other が in them tend to prefer を to avoid pile-ups. What is not correct is 水みずをほしい — ほしい never takes を.

Beyond the basics

You cannot use these about other people

This is the rule that surprises everyone. In Japanese, another person's desires are not something you can state as fact. For a third person, use 〜たがる / ほしがる:

弟おとうとは新あたらしい自転車じてんしゃをほしがっています。 — My brother wants a new bike. (polite — ほしがる, and note it takes を) 彼かれは日本にほんに行いきたがっています。 — He wants to go to Japan. (polite — たがる)

Note two things: the がる forms normally appear in the teiru form, and ほしがる switches the particle to を, because がる makes it a verb ("shows signs of wanting").

The alternative is to hedge instead: 行いきたいみたいです, 行いきたいそうです, 行いきたいと思おもっています. All of these mark the thought as reported rather than known — the same instinct behind 〜と思おもっています for other people's thoughts.

What does たがる actually mean, and why is it a verb?

たがる is the third-person version of たい, and the reason it behaves so differently is that it is not an adjective at all — がる turns a feeling into a verb meaning "shows signs of". 行いきたい describes an inner state you have direct access to; 行いきたがる describes observable behaviour that a desire is producing in someone else.

That is why the three things below all change at once:

  • It conjugates as a verb. 行いきたがる, 行いきたがらない, 行いきたがった — not 行いきたがい.
  • It usually appears as 〜たがっている. The plain 行いきたがる reads as a general tendency ("he's always wanting to go"), while 行いきたがっている is the specific right-now version.
  • ほしがる switches the particle to を. 自転車じてんしゃがほしい but 自転車じてんしゃをほしがる, because the sentence now has a real verb in it.

同僚どうりょうはいつも新あたらしいことをやりたがっています。 — My colleague always wants to try new things. (polite — a repeated tendency) みんな出席しゅっせきしたがっている。 — Everyone wants to attend. (casual — observable from how they are acting)

There is one register warning attached. Because たがる reports on someone from the outside, it can sound slightly detached or even faintly critical, which is why you do not use it about a customer or a superior. For those, the hedged forms above — 〜たいようです, 〜たいとおっしゃっています — are the safe route.

〜てほしい: asking without asking

ちょっと手伝てつだってほしいんですけど。 — I'd like you to help me a bit… (polite, trailing — a soft request)

てほしい states your wish rather than issuing an instruction, which makes it gentler than 〜てください. The person marked with に is the one you want to act: 田中たなかさんに来きてほしい.

The negative is ないでほしい: 言いわないでほしい ("I'd rather you didn't say that").

〜たいですか can be too direct

Asking a superior 何なにが食たべたいですか is grammatically fine and socially blunt — it puts their desires on the table for inspection. Softer options:

何なにになさいますか。 — What will you have? (very polite — honorific なさる) お茶ちゃでもいかがですか。 — Would you like some tea? (polite offer)

Among friends, 何なに食たべたい? is completely normal. The problem is only upwards.

〜たいと思おもっています

Attaching 思おもっています softens a stated desire into a considered intention, which is why it dominates job interviews and formal self-introductions:

将来しょうらい、日本にほんで働はたらきたいと思おもっています。 — I'm hoping to work in Japan in the future. (polite — measured, not blurted)

How do you say you wanted to do something — and didn't?

This is the past form's real job, and it is where learners fall apart. 〜たかった on its own just reports a past desire, and Japanese listeners will assume the thing did not happen unless you say otherwise.

行いきたかったです。 — I wanted to go. (polite — and the strong implication is that you didn't) 行いきたかったんですが、時間じかんがありませんでした。 — I wanted to go, but I didn't have time. (polite — the んです frames it as an explanation)

To say it explicitly, join the two halves with けど or が rather than starting a new sentence. The connector goes on the past form, not on a dictionary form:

食たべたかったけど、お店みせが閉しまっていました。 — I wanted to eat there, but the shop was closed. (casual) 買かいたかったが、高たかすぎた。 — I wanted to buy it, but it was too expensive. (plain, written or narrated)

The wrong version learners produce is a mix of tenses — 行いきたかったから行いかないと思おもいます, blending a past wish with a present-tense conclusion. Keep the whole sentence in the past: 行いきたかったけど、行いけませんでした.

And if the thing did happen, say so, because otherwise the たかった is misleading. 行いきたかったので、行いきました ("I wanted to go, so I went") is the natural way to keep the desire and the outcome together.

ほしい also means "desirable" in the abstract

もう少すこし時間じかんがほしいですね。 — We could do with a bit more time. (polite — a shared wish, not a personal demand)

Used this way it is closer to English "it'd be good to have," and it can include the listener rather than only the speaker.

Common mistakes

  • 水みずをほしいです. ほしい takes が: 水みずがほしいです.
  • 彼かれは行いきたいです. Other people need 行いきたがっています, or a hedge like 行いきたいみたいです.
  • ほしいでした / 行いきたいでした. These are い-adjectives: ほしかったです, 行いきたかったです.
  • 飲のむたい. たい attaches to the ます-stem: 飲のみたい.
  • Using 〜たいですか with a boss. Grammatically fine, socially blunt. Use いかがですか or なさいますか.
  • Confusing ほしがる's particle. ほしい takes が, but ほしがる takes を.

Practice

Answers are hidden — build yours first, then open. Questions 1 and 2 are a pair: same water, and only the kind of wanting changes.

1. Say "I want water."

Show answer

水みずがほしいです — a thing, so noun + が + ほしい. を is never correct with ほしい.

2. Say "I want to drink water."

Show answer

水みずが飲のみたいです — an action, so ます-stem + たい. This is the pair to question 1.

3. Something is wrong here: 昨日きのうは行いきたいでした。

Show answer

行いきたかったです — たい is an い-adjective, so the past is かった.

4. Something is wrong here: 彼かれは日本にほんに行いきたいです。

Show answer

行いきたがっています — you cannot state another person's desire as fact. がる, usually in the teiru form.

5. Say "my brother wants a new bike."

Show answer

弟おとうとは新あたらしい自転車じてんしゃをほしがっています — ほしがる is a verb, so the particle switches from が to を.

6. Ask someone to help you, softly, using ほしい.

Show answer

ちょっと手伝てつだってほしいんですけど — てほしい states a wish rather than giving an instruction, which is gentler than てください.

7. Say "I'd rather you didn't say that."

Show answer

言いわないでほしいです — the negative of てほしい is ないでほしい.

8. Your boss is choosing lunch. Is 何なにが食たべたいですか a good question?

Show answer

Grammatical but blunt — 何なにになさいますか or お茶ちゃでもいかがですか are the upward-facing versions. With friends, 何なに食たべたい? is fine.

9. Say "I'm hoping to work in Japan in the future," in a job-interview register.

Show answer

将来しょうらい、日本にほんで働はたらきたいと思おもっています — 思おもっています turns a blurted wish into a considered intention.

10. Make 食たべる into the たい form, and say what it attaches to.

Show answer

食たべたい — the ます-stem — 食たべます minus ます, plus たい. Not the dictionary form.

FAQ

Is たい ever used with ください? No. たいてください does not exist. For requests, use てほしい or てください.

What about ほしがっている vs ほしがる? The plain ほしがる is generic ("children want toys"); the teiru form describes a specific person right now, which is what you usually mean.

Can I use たい in the negative to refuse? Yes, and it is common: 行いきたくないです. It is direct, though — a softer refusal trails off instead: ちょっと…

Is 欲ほしい written in kanji? Both appear. 欲ほしい is standard in writing; kana is common in casual text.

What is 〜たがっている for objects? Nothing — がる is for people. For a machine "wanting" something, Japanese rephrases entirely.

Does 〜たい work with する verbs? Yes: 勉強べんきょうしたい, 電話でんわしたい. The stem of します is し.

Vocabulary from this article

Tap the block to select all of it, then copy. In Anki: File → Import, note type Basic, separator Tab — the first column becomes the front, the second the back.

欲しい	ほしい — to want (a thing)
水	みず — water
飲む	のむ — to drink
新しい	あたらしい — new
靴	くつ — shoes
日本	にほん — Japan
行く	いく — to go
本	ほん — book
読む	よむ — to read
昨日	きのう — yesterday
食べる	たべる — to eat
弟	おとうと — younger brother
自転車	じてんしゃ — bicycle
手伝う	てつだう — to help
言う	いう — to say
将来	しょうらい — the future
働く	はたらく — to work
時間	じかん — time
お茶	おちゃ — tea
勉強	べんきょう — study
電話	でんわ — telephone
高い	たかい — expensive, high

I'm Yuuki, a Japanese teacher based in Tokyo. I've taught on italki as a Top 1% teacher and watched over 1,500 anime. The rule that stops learners cold is not the particle — it is being told they cannot say what someone else wants. It is worth sitting with, because the same logic runs through 思おもう, 感かんじる and every other verb about the inside of a head.

Book a trial lesson · $13

Sources: the author's own lessons and standard reference grammars.

More drills like the ones above, plus a timed JLPT-style mock test: Practice · N5

Want to try this in a real conversation?

30-minute trial lesson, $13. Times shown in your own timezone.

Book a trial lesson · $13